Backing Away from the Ledge

So, after having an existential crisis of sorts,
I’ve moved past the paralyzing dread for the moment
and am choosing to allow myself to focus on the small details of my life.
Because even though they are minute and don’t matter to the existence of the universe or the human race or the country or city or town or neighborhood,
they matter to me,
and as far as I know this is the only life I have to live
(at least that I will have conscious awareness of because V sure this place recycles our souls and fully identify with the fact I was or will be a blade of grass at one time, but I digress.)

And with that thought, I give myself permission to make this house a home.
To fuss over the details that will bring me joy
and make me feel settled, safe, calm, happy.

After all, if life as we know it can end at any moment,
why spend it any other way?